Monday, April 20, 2009

more on "evil" judging

Thinking about yesterday's post, I am again reminded how lucky I am that Alec has Down syndrome! One of the best things about Down syndrome is that it is easily recognizable. If someone looks at Alec, they immediately know he has a disability. This is nice because they tend to be more accepting of him and of his behavior. They excuse the odd things he does because they tend to understand that he's mentally younger than his physical age.

I have often felt sorry for people with children whose disabilities are not recognizable in the child's appearance. They tend to get judged so quickly.

A friend of mine has two sons with Tourette's. They have uncontrollable tics like shouting in inappropriate times and places. As a mother, she says the best reaction she even hopes for is people ignoring her and her children. Most people stare at them, look disapprovingly, and even vocally express their disapproval. She gets told she needs to control her children. She gets judged to be a bad mom even though there is nothing she can do. She actually works extremely hard to do all the "right" things to help them learn and grow.

On the one hand, Alec can be a victim because of his appearance. Sometimes when people recognize the Down syndrome, they assume he can't do anything for himself or they treat him like an infant. On the other hand, it is nice when people cut him (and me) a little slack when his behavior is not the greatest or the most appropriate.

Again, it all comes back to the "evil" of our ignorance of applying labels and making judgments without having all the facts.

1 comment:

  1. i remember when i had such bad back problems i would take the electic carts at smiths...i was 26 and couldnt feel my feet so walking was difficult. the looks i got from some people, like i was playing on them were terrible.
    i hope everyone gives me some slack every day...im a hot mess.

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